#15 Quiet

Personally tests have always confused me. Frequently my answers depend on my mood, or I want to answer more than one way, but can't. I had the same sort of experience reading "Quiet", I felt torn. The chapters about introverts were relevant, I kept thinking, "hey, that's me", but surprisingly, the chapters on extroversion were relevant to me too. So I guess that's it, I'm an Ambivert. I need the time to sit and think, but I also need time with people. It's an interesting balancing act that makes me feel like I'm trying to fool my other side.

Reading "Quiet" allowed me to reflect on my introverted side, a side that I tend not to give enough attention to.  The thing is that the need to interact with people, in fact that's one reason in the end that I decided on teaching instead of pursuing research.  Professors spend way too much time for my taste cloistered in their offices.  That's not a bad thing, but it wouldn't be good for my psyche.  I need human interaction.

Reading "Quiet" has helped me to see that understanding what I need and setting boundaries so I can get it is okay.  I don't have to cater to my extrovert side all of the time.  I don't have to be an introvert to love science.  I can spend time fostering friendships and sitting quietly with my own thoughts.  I can accept the fact that being a mother to demanding children is draining for me and that its okay to take time out.

I also noticed that I was buying into the extrovert ideal, getting annoyed with my kids when they won't talk to someone.  I've quit trying to make my kids branch out a little, except in situations where they need to develop skills in talking to others, like ordering food and speaking up when they need to before I read "Quiet", but now I feel clearer about why I need to let go.  I try to explain social niceties, but still allow room for them to make their own decisions in interactions.  Sometimes it is hard because I think my kids are perceived as snobby, when they are really just shy.  They are going to have to learn how to navigate those waters by themselves.

I really liked "Quiet".  It was good to take some time to reflect on my personality and figure somethings out.  I highly recommend it, especially to those of you that are introverts, it's a breath of fresh air.